she is enough!

my heart aches as i just finished reading another blog on how mental illness has taken control over someone's life.  this sweet girl McKenna, only 18 has discovered that she has BPD {BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER}.

 

{photo credit}

 

i can not say enough about how BRAVE she is.  please read blog and share her{ story}.  the more people know, the more they understand.  if only i knew what she is learning now, how much better and easier my life could of been.  this young lady is wise beyond her years and i am truly proud to say i know her family.  i hope she knows she is NEVER alone and that she IS ENOUGH!!!

 

 this life is a true test and adventure, what we learn from it only makes us better and stronger.  remember, we don't wear signs and we don't know what others may be going through.  show love, be kind, give a smile, a hug or simple gesture to acknowledge them.  we are all struggling with some kind of trials in this large big world, please don't make it harder on someone else to make yourself feel better.  he never said it would be easy, he only said it would be worth it.

 

may is BPD awareness month and it's a great time to learn more, share more, help more and love more.

 

{here} you can read my post i wrote over 2 years ago.

 

love and hugs

connie

how are you today?

today i am struggling.

i know it's been awhile since i have blogged.
a lot has been going on in my life since my aunt went home to heaven.
i find the days  and nights difficult.
i know this will take time...i know this, but it's hard.

i do believe i AM a giver.
that no matter what is going on with my life, i take the time for others.
i have been taking this class soul restoration from the brave girls club.
it has made me REALLY dig into my soul.
into my ENTIRE soul...
the good.
the bad.
the ugly.
the sad.
the happy.
the scared.
the funny.
the confused.
it's been really hard for me to allow myself to stir up these emotions.
after doing so...i am to see them for what they are and then move forward.
to not allow my past to hold me back anymore.

have you done this?
i tell you...
it is very HARD!

i realized that for most of my life i have been...
afraid
ashamed
scared
misunderstood
unloved
in pain
lost loved ones
lonely
mistreated
depressed
lost friends
been alone
misused
judged
angry
abandoned.

i know at times being alone is ok but feeling really alone is down right scary!
i know that NO ONE can make me happy.
i know that things won't make me happy.
i know that without loving myself FIRST...
i CAN'T be happy.
i won't feel loved!

have you ever thought about what it is that holds you back?

what holds you back of truly being happy?

what is it that makes you sad or feel alone?

"be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle".

~author unknown

thanks for stopping by. 

i do love you, ALL of you!!!

{{hugs}}

connie

navyformoms!!!!

so excited to join this site!!!  you might want to check it out if you are a navy mom. i think i am about ready for this new adventure in my life. i get to see my boy, trevor in 17 days before he is off to boot camp. i am so thankful, blessed and honored to be his mom.


Visit Navy For Moms

has it really been that long????

i can't believe it has been over a year since i have blogged!!!  wow, a lot has happened and that i guess has kept me away. 

i am going to try and write a least once a month.  if i write more, YAY for me.  this has been a place of holding many stories, many memories, trials and happiness.  a place where i share a little about me and what i go through in hopes i may leave a story.  sometimes those stories even help others. 

here is to making a goal for myself on leaving small stories of my journey...keep checking in as the rest is still unwritten.

love and hugs,
connie

Attitude of Gratitude

day 7:  i am grateful for home.

i am truly blessed to have a husband who provides what our family needs in a home.  we don't need a huge mansion.  we don't need to be in the fanciest neighborhood.  we just need to have a roof over our heads.  a place of shelter.  heat to keep us warm.  water to clean and cook with.  electric to allow us to see and work.  most of all we need each other, all of us {tom, me, austin, trevor, dallin, haleigh (and levi our dog)}.  this does not include all of the other things we are blessed with to call our house our HOME!  thank you tom for our home.  without you, it would only be a house.  without our children, we would not be home!  i am truly grateful for my HOME!!

don't forget to be grateful for your home.

Attitude of Gratitude

day 6:  i am grateful for the privilege to vote!

i know we all do not agree the same but it is truly a privilege to vote.  much of what i stand for and the freedoms i get to eNjoY are because of my right to vote.  i hope you made your voice heard today by voting your beliefs.  truly grateful!!  wishing our country a peaceful ending to this election. 

did you vote tOdaY?

Attitude of Gratitude

day 5:  i am grateful for guardianship.

not only am i the mother of my son austin, i am his legal guardian as well.  no one ever thinks that they need guardianship over their child but in some cases, you have to.  i had to legally go to court to become his guardian and conservator.  this came with a lot of stress, many appointments, lawyers, a judge, tons of paperwork and an investigation.  wow, just to be his legal guardian.  i'm his mom, why all of this?  today we went to another one of our annual court hearing.  he was all dressed sharply with his hair styled ready to go.  the judge asked me questions then asked him questions.  then austin asked her "do you have any questions for me"?  she said "no, but do you have questions for me"  austin responded with "yes".  he asked the judge if he has to come next year because he hates missing out on his day program.  it was so cute!!  the judge answered "austin, it is always your right to come if you want too but if you don't i will make sure your mom tells you everything that happened here.  i want you to know that you are welcome to come if you want to".  he said "ok, i don't want to come".  we all chuckled.  i had a tear in my eye while i was sitting there.  thinking of all my extra responsibilities to be his guardian {even though i was already doing them}.  i though how god has entrusted me with his care.  how austin chose me.  how blessed i am.  how grown up he has become.  how he is trying everyday to be more independent.  how much i learned from this young man.  i know the challenges he took upon his self before he came to earth were not easy ones.  not may of us would choose complete blindness, retardation and autism.  this young man has blessed my life beyond words.  to know that i have him until he returns home, fills me with much gratitude.  he will not live in a group home or with someone else...he is mine.  my responsibility, my son, one of my greatest accomplishments.  thank you judge ruechel.  for allowing me to continue to be his legal guardian even though i AM already his mom.

what are you grateful for tOdaY?

Attitude of Gratitude

day 4: i am grateful for forgiveness.

i am truly grateful for the power of forgiveness.  not only to forgive others but also myself.  it's hard to forgive but we are commanded to.  when i allow myself to forgive others i feel a huge load lifted off my shoulders.  i feel as though i can breathe easier, life seems simpler and i am much happier.  now forgiving myself...that is still a daily challenge.  though when i finally do...i can let go and move forward.  without forgiveness you are at a stand still.  stuck in a time or place that brings you much pain and heartache.  this is not how we are to live.  we are to forgive all.

"For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins".  ~Matther 6:14-15

is there someone {or yourself}
 that you need to forgive today?

Attitude of Gratitude

day 3: i'm grateful for rest.

today was not a good day. i suffered from a major headache and it was not going away with anything i tried.  i however was able to just rest.  i think it is something a lot of us just take for granite.  i've struggled with sleep and headaches for a long time now.  a few years ago i finally got some much needed answered to both.  i should know when my body is telling me to slow down.  the trouble is, i don't always listen.. there is always too much to do that i don't have time to slow down.  when i don't listen to my body i surely pay the price.  so today it was just me, my blanket & pillow on the couch watching movies.  i am truly grateful for having the chance to just rest today.  i think my body is very grateful too. 

what did you do to let your body rest today?

Attitude of Gratitude

day 2:  i am grateful for that still small voice.

today i had things that needed to be done at a certain time.  i head on my merry way to get them started when i realize the place is closed for inspection.  seriously?!  no notice at all and i had to get this done. there was a number to call so i called it.  left a message and waited there 20 minutes and NOTHING.  i decided that i couldn't wait any longer and i must leave.  as i was pulling away i saw a vehicle come into the same parking lot as me. i was prompted to turned around and so i did.  {i don't know why, yes i do}  the gentlemen was going into the building i needed to get into.  i politely asked "how long it would be close" and he said "all day".  i told him who i worked for and that i really needed to get in there to do my job.  he asked how long it would take.  i responded with "it depends on how many permits there are".  he said to come in and i did.  i was able to complete my job all because i listened to a voice telling me to wait and to turn around.  sometimes when you feel or get that prompt to do something is always good to listen.  there have been many times in my life {some life and death situations} where this has happened to me.  i am so grateful to have the knowledge that i should stop and listen! 

have you ever been prompted to stop and listen?